Terrible Analogies

During these recent holidays the local news was encouraging people who drink not to drive while intoxicated. The talking heads urged us to take advantage of taxicabs, busses, and the local trolley system:

Screw the taxis and the trolleys.  My drunk ass would want to be in that train that freakin’ jumps over the trolleys and busses!  I mean, just look at that air time!  Is Keanu Reeves the conductor?  Yeee Hawww!