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Five Minute Fiction 69

February 11th, 2013 Leave a comment Go to comments

An ongoing weekly experiment where I give myself five minutes to write something. Don’t think about anything. Just write. When done, walk away, coming back later to correct any glaring errors.

This week’s “story” was inspired by our three-year-old having a fit this past Saturday and not being nice for mom.

Enjoy?

No Such Thing As Monsters

Little Tyler drudged up the steps
Stomping down at each stair
Threw his toy, pouted his lip
And shouted “It’s not fair!”

“Why do I have to go to sleep?
It’s not even that late
Don’t treat me like a kid, mommy
I’m very nearly eight!”

“Now listen to your father and me,”
Tyler’s mother said
“You’ve a busy day tomorrow,
It’s time to go to bed.”

That big ‘ole moon has risen up
The sun is counting sheep
It’s time that you lay down your head
And get a little sleep

“But mom, I’m a big boy now,
Don’t treat me like I’m four!”
He yelled out as he ran upstairs
And slammed his bedroom door.

“I don’t need them, I’m a grown up,”
He whispered to himself
“They’ll see that I’m a big boy now
And don’t need any help .”

But for a little man of eight
He had one lingering fear
That of the dark and of the night
And monsters drawing near

He took a breath, turned off the light
And dashed towards his bed
Dove feet first under the blankets
And covered up his head

Shaking underneath the sheets
He said a little prayer
“There are no such things as monsters,
My room isn’t their lair.”

Repeating this he fell asleep
With dreams he disembarked
Until he heard a shuffling
From somewhere in the dark

From deep within his bedroom sheets
He peeked into the room
And spied something large by the door
Lurch oddly in the gloom

It seemed to thrash and twitch about
This shadow black as tar
It quivered, wobbled, and pulsed
Like jelly in a jar

Blacker than night this murky shape
Swayed forward, back, and yon
Then reached out with an arm
And flipped the light switch on

And there it stood, ten feet or more
Hunched over like a troll
Its gnarled body like a tree trunk
With skin as black as coal

And from the center of its mass
A mouth of ivory teeth
Snapped like a set of jagged knives
Stacked in lines nine rows deep

Above this mouth of fine honed fangs
Two eyes glowed amber red
They focused on the little boy
Cowering in his bed

With massive hands like granite stone
It pummeled at the ground
And shouted with a wooden throat
A ghastly, timbered sound

“What have we here?  A little boy
Grown up before his time,
Who doesn’t want the love of mom
An adult before his prime.”

“My name is Shroo: The Great And Fierce,”
This creature he did bellow
“A fiendish, shuffling nightmare
Born of dusk and shadow.”

“My one job is to stalk and catch
Sulky children such as you,
Who shun the love of their parents
And make them feel blue.”

“By ancient law, your soul is mine,
So don’t you try to flee,
Or struggle much, it matters not
Either way…you come with me!”

This giant’s hand swooped in an arc
Slamming down near Tyler,
Flipping splintered bed upside down
And boy into the air

Landing like a rolling baseball
Tyler tumbled on the floor
Coming to a stop behind Shroo
He snuck out through the door

Enraged that it had lost its prey
The deathly monster roared
It spit and cursed and swung it’s fists
Breaking wall and floor and board

“Mommy!  Daddy!” Tyler shouted
“A monster’s in my room!
It’s trying to take me away
And to my certain doom!”

Into mommy’s arms Tyler ran
Shaking like a wet hen
“I’m sorry I wasn’t very nice,
I won’t do that again!”

Dad stood up and said to Tyler
“Don’t worry son, I’ll check.”
Leaving mom to hug Tyler
And stroke his reeling neck

Dad wasn’t gone that very long
But ran back wild-eyed
“Quick!” he screamed, “Get in the car!
We’re leaving, don’t ask why!”

“What’s going on?  What did you see?”
Mom asked terrified
“Tyler’s room has been demolished!”
Dad shouted in reply

“The walls were stripped, the carpets torn
The furniture destroyed.
And through the broken window
Eyes stared in through the void!”

Together they ran for the car
And drove into the black
That was many years ago
They never did come back

And the moral of this tale
That’s 100% true
If you treat your mom like dirt
You’ll be visited by Shroo

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  1. February 11th, 2013 at 04:13 | #1

    *clapping* Oh that was genius writing, I was glued to the story from start to finish and loved it. Well done, my friend.

  2. jenny_o
    jenny_o
    February 11th, 2013 at 09:42 | #2

    Started with a light touch but rapidly became something you probably shouldn’t let Tyler read for a few years yet!! Well done. Love the last verse :)

  3. February 11th, 2013 at 09:54 | #3

    Valerie :

    *clapping* Oh that was genius writing, I was glued to the story from start to finish and loved it. Well done, my friend.

    Thanks Val! It’s a bit dark for a 3-year-old (Tyler just had his birthday this past weekend), but is an enjoyable read for adults :-)

  4. February 11th, 2013 at 09:55 | #4

    jenny_o :

    Started with a light touch but rapidly became something you probably shouldn’t let Tyler read for a few years yet!! Well done. Love the last verse :)

    Totally agree! I wasn’t sure where this thing was going when I started it. Seems my writing tends to naturally trend towards the darker side of things. Heh… Tyler just turned three this past weekend, but I found rhyming the word “eight” so much easier ;-)

  5. February 11th, 2013 at 09:56 | #5

    *thunderous applause*

    *cheering wildly*

    This post was BEYOND brilliant!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    You are so clever!

    And loved this

    “Don’t treat me like a kid, mommy
    I’m very nearly eight!”

    Bwhahahahahahahaha!

    And this…..

    “And the moral of this tale
    That’s 100% true
    If you treat your mom like dirt
    You’ll be visited by Shroo”

    Faaaaaaaabulous!!!!

    Thanks so much for sharing, buddy. Have a great week!

  6. February 11th, 2013 at 12:01 | #6

    @Ron
    Thanks, my friend! Honestly, I wasn’t sure how this tale was going to end up.

  7. February 11th, 2013 at 14:48 | #7

    That was amazing! I really don’t know how you possibly write these in 5 minutes. I think something like that would take me all day. You truly are talented and I’m still waiting to hear about your fiction book to come out some day.

  8. February 11th, 2013 at 16:25 | #8

    Jen :

    That was amazing! I really don’t know how you possibly write these in 5 minutes. I think something like that would take me all day. You truly are talented and I’m still waiting to hear about your fiction book to come out some day.

    Well, to be honest, I had about half of this written in ten minutes. The other half I worked on for about 30 minutes Saturday morning while mom and Tyler were out.

    What I usually do on weekends is work on a story idea in my head, then write up as much as I can Sunday evening in a five minute flurry of activity. Of course, sometimes I have no idea what I’m going to write until I sit down. It’s all rather ad hoc, depending on the weekend…

  9. Dash Riprock
    Dash Riprock
    February 11th, 2013 at 21:19 | #9

    Hope Tyler had a very happy birthday! –Dash

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