Terrible Analogies

Oh, how my inner rage smiled while watching this red band trailer to God Bless America:

Insipid people, self-righteous assholes, the slow death of television via reality shows, rude behavior, and the decline of society in general; this movie really hits home for me.

Here’s counting down the days until its eventual release, most likely to smaller theaters. But hey, at least at the art house locations people are less likely to be using their cellphones.

Happy (revengeful) Friday!

The trailer for the upcoming movie The Amazing Spider-Man movie is finally out, and it looks great!

The web shooters are back, The Lizard is the enemy, and best of all it doesn’t look like we’re going to have to sit through another boring origin story. The guy playing Peter Parker (Andrew Garfield) looks the part of a gawky teenager, the tweaks to the costume are well done, Dennis Leary makes an appearance, and the fight scenes look fantastic.

Perhaps it’s a bit too early to judge, but it looks like the series is stepping up its game, and is poised to top the previous trilogy in both aesthetics and box office draw.

Can’t wait!

I’ve been absorbed in writing my great American novel and didn’t bother to look at the time.  Before I knew it the day was done and I had no post for the blog.

But fear not, intrepid believer.  It’s on the old stand-by: Pimp somebody else’s site!

And so, here are some fine examples of movie posters from an alternate universe, courtsey of Behance Network.  Please check out the link for more examples!

I’m quite partial to The Hangover and Inception posters.  I wonder if these will ever be offered for sale?

Yet another indicator that the entertainment industry has run out of ideas; Napoleon Dynamite is set to become an animated television show on Fox.

With a large number of talented artists and writers available who would be more than capable of producing an animated show of worth (Jhonen Vaszuez, Roman Dirge, Elmore Leonard, Fred Venturini, Chuck Palahniuk, Neal Stephenson, etc…), it’s a wonder why Fox is trying to beat a dead horse with Napoleon Dynamite.

If Fox isn’t even going to give deserving talent a shot at creating something unique, may I suggest that they rethink their choice of source material?  Do something with a bit of an edge to it.  Something with a bit of bite.  Something that will not only give the artists something entertaining to work on, but also give the viewer a television show that’s worth thirty minutes of their time.

If they’re going to dig into the round bin of history and rehash existing material for conversion to animation, may I suggest that they consider the following movies?:

Eraserhead
Schindler’s List
Ichi The Killer
Leaving Las Vegas
Blue Velvet
The Road
The Killing Fields
Midnight Cowboy
Million Dollar Baby
The Elephant Man
Se7en
The Pianist
The Wrestler
The Human Centipede

Just once I’d like to wake up on Saturday morning, pour myself a heapin’ bowl of Apple Jacks, plop down on the couch and zone out to the escapes of an animated Joseph Merrick as he limps heavy-bone about town (while uttering his catchphrase, “So sue me for forgetting!”), comically proportioned Detective Mills and Somerset as they agonize over what’s in the box, and a celebrity-voiced Henry Spencer as he daydreams about the singing lady in his radiator.

Maybe it’s just me, but if you’re going to throw in the towel and try to cash in the passe past, count me out.  Let me know when you’re willing to gamble on something interesting.  Only then will I subject myself to a television show whose sole goal is to get me to watch advertisements.

2012 is shaping up to be one heck of a year for movies.

Last night as I was tooling around the ‘net I happened upon the trailer for the better-late-than-never Men In Black III. It’s great to see that the third installment of this series hasn’t lost touch with the alien/humor angle that made the previous two films a blast to watch:

And on that same night I happened upon the teaser trailer for The Expendables II. The original Expendables brought together some of my favorite action movie heroes from the 80′s and the 90′s, and part II carries over this winning formula to include Chuck Norris and Van Damme.

Aw yeah! If ever there was a movie aimed at guys, it’s The Expendables!

2012 can’t come soon enough. Sure, there’s that whole end-of-the-world scenario to contend with, but at least we’ll be able to go out with a bang having watched MiB III and The Expendables II.