Terrible Analogies

Today we traversed the wilds of Wisconsin, barreling through the invisible border into Minnesota at 85 per, eventually skidding to a stop in the parking lot of the jewel of the midwest…the Mall Of America.

Anxious to see what this side of the country considers their Disneyland, their Taj Majal, their very Mecca itself, we braced ourselves for close contact with NASCAR aficionados, recent Favre converts, and rugged ranch hand farmers.  Oddly enough, contrary to our misguided preconceived big-city notions, we had a great time.

I’ve heard a lot about the Mall Of America, and wasn’t about to pass up an opportunity to travel a scant five hours via car to take bask in its capitalistic glory.

Upon first entering this uniquely American mosque, we found ourselves swimming in a sea of rabid scrap bookers queued up by the hundreds, each hoping to secure a spot in a seminar being hosted by the Home Shopping Channel.  While the women were standing in various lines waiting to take part in either scrap booking classes or partake in scrap booking business transactions, the husbands were busy doing this:

Poor guys.  I sympathize.  Soldier on, brothers…  

But, after making our way past this madness, rounding a few corners, and valiantly avoiding the Orange Julius stand (mmmm….Orange Julius!), we were greeted with the main attraction of this particular mall (click to embiggen):

The central amusement park!  Like a overactive child fresh off his meds and flying high on a can of Coke and two bowls of Lucky Charms, I broke free and headed straight for the ride that had the most screaming:

The Rock Bottom Plunge offers a 90º free-fall drop, speeding into a tight loop, over various twists and turns, and straight into my palpitating heart.  This, the Avatar Airbender ride, and the Fairly Odd Coaster were the big “E” ticket rides, and the wait for each was mere minutes.  

The Flying Dutchman, guarding his towering wall climbing attraction.

After taking in the rides, if you’re feeling the romantic urge to get married, there’s a chapel on the grounds that provides just such a service:

And so, with the power of 20/20 hindsight, if I had to give the Mall Of America a rating of 1-10, I’d have to give it a solid ‘B’.  I feel sorry for the families who make this hive of activity their vacation destination.  But for the curious and the bored, the Mall Of America offers enough distractions to fill an afternoon.

After ten hours of travel, we’ve finally arrived in Wisconsin.  On the car ride through the quiet country tree-lined roads, slowly working our way to our hotel, I was halfway expecting the Mothman to jump out of the darkened forest and into the path of our car, eyes glowing red in the headlights, mouth agape, hissing and spitting through ragged teeth and over forked tongue, telepathically warning us to turn back, to go back home before it’s too late.  

Country roads are something that I’m just not used to.

I picked up Dan Brown’s newest novel The Lost Symbol before we departed from the San Diego airport, and have very nearly finished it.  If you haven’t already dug into this book, I’d highly suggest that you pick it up.  It’s some serious literary candy, guaranteed to give your brain cavities.  I’m already looking forward to the eventual movie.

By the time you read this, Karin and I will be well into our fight to Wisconsin to visit her folks.  I will return on the 24th, so if there’s a dearth of postings between now and then, please forgive me.  I’m not slacking off, but rather doing my best to fool Karin’s folks that I’m a fine, decent, upstanding member of society.

I’m praying that I’ll be able to access the ‘net from Wisconsin, but from what I’ve heard they only recently got electricity and running water, so I’m not holding out much hope for a decent network connection. I am bringing my camera on the slim chance that I’ll be able to post updates in between my tours of famous barns and vast fields of whatever they grow over there.

So….can I pick up anything from Wisconsin for anybody?  Perhaps a nifty shot glass from the airport?

It’s amazing how much work vacations are.  I feel as if I need a few days off to recover from mine
 
All in all we had a great time.  I went on several nice runs, Karin and I visited a few of the nearby coastal towns, we had some fantastic local food pulled straight from the sea, and happy hour began at 5pm every night.

Alas, all good things must pass.  For now it’s back to the grind.  The next big outing for me will be the Mt. Whitney run in September.  Better put in for a few days off from work for that some time this week.

The view from the top of Point Arena lighthouse

The Gualala River feeding into the sea

Deep in the forest at Sea Ranch

One of the paths I ran at Sea Ranch

We’re halfway through our vacation, and as luck would have it the lodge has wireless.  It’s a five mile car ride to the lodge, but it’s well worth the trip to to quickly log in and check out what’s happening at work and to update the blog.  I feel like I’m going through withdrawals from lack of consistent posts

Anyway, here are a few pics from Sea Ranch, unedited:

The inside of the 2000 square foot home we're renting

it's a three bedroom home right above the ocean

The view outside the backyard door

Each evening the deer swing by, signaling a start to happy hour

We're surrounded by forests on one side...

...and ocean on the other.

We stopped by the Korbel winery on the way up

Korbel winery

Anyway, more to come!  Updates will resume on the 18th.