Terrible Analogies

Yep. Cat on a subwoofer. That’s all I got today

Overtime calls! Time to go back to work…

Some people, for whatever reason, be it a tweak in their genes or uncommon quotient of luck, tend to stand out from the crowd.  These individuals exhibit skills above and beyond what most would consider normal.  Quite often, these gifted folks evolve into our sports heroes, accomplished artists, and captains of industry.  The most phenomenal and uncannily brilliant can even change the course of history.

And then there are those who lack even the most basic of survival skills, and whose continued existence continues to shock us all.

The ingenious and accomplished belong in the Matrix.

The others…not so much. For example:

Matrix:

Not the Matrix:

Matrix:

Not the Matrix:

“Oh-My-God” Matrix:

Not the Matrix:

Happy Friday!

NOTE: Video appears to be down. Let’s hear it for sites removing content!

There are things I’ve done in my life that I’ll forever be ashamed of; washing colors and whites together, turning everything a shade of pink, taking advantage of the handicapped stall when a wheelchair-bound individual entered the restroom, accidentally calling my 5th grade teacher “mom”…but none of that can possibly equal the action of this individual:

What must have been going through his mind?

If this were me, I don’t think I’d have quite the death grip on the leash as the elevator began its upward trajectory. Just let that thing go and hope for the best.

Next week I hear he’s going to take his dog to the Grand Canyon. Let’s see how that turns out…

…Is it me you’re looking for?

I can only imagine how long this must have taken to put together:

The editor must have had the patience of a saint, and the tenacity of a tabloid freelance writer…

There are certain things that hold more meaning when David Attenborough narrates the message. I can’t imagine Oprah Winfrey or Sigourney Weaver lending as much of an air of respect and humility to Louis Armstrong’s What A Wonderful World.

Long live Sir David Attenborough.

Happy Friday the 13th, everybody!